Going through changes - Eminem

I’m going through changes
I’m going through changes

Lately I really feel like I’m rollin’ for delf like Philly
Feel like I’m losin’ control of myself
I sincerely apologize if all that I sound like is I’m complainin’
But life keeps on complicatin’
And I’m debatin’ on leavin’ this world this evenin’
Even my girls can see I’m grievin’
I try and hide it but I can’t
Why do I act like I’m all high and mighty
When inside I’m dyin’
I am finally realizin’ I need help
Can’t do it myself, too weak
Two weeks I’ve been havin’ ups and downs
Goin’ through peaks and valleys
Dilly dallyin’ round with the idea of endin’ this shit right here
I’m hatin’ my reflection
I walk around the house tryin’ to fight mirrors
I can’t stand what I look like, yeah
I look fat, but what do I care?
I give a fuck
Only thing I fear’s Hailie
I’m afraid if I close my eyes that I might see her, shit

I’m going through changes
I’m going through changes

I lock myself in the bedroom, bathroom
Nappin’ at noon, yeah, dad’s in a bad mood, he’s always snappin’ at you
“Marshall, what happened that you
Can’t stop with these pills
And you fallin’ off with your skills
And your own fans are laughin’ at you?”
It become a problem you’re too pussy to tackle
Get up, be a man, stand
A real man would have had this shit handled
Know you just had your heart ripped out and crushed
They say Proof just flipped out
Homie just whipped out and bust
Nah, it ain’t like Doody to do that
He wouldn’t fuckin’ shoot at nobody, he’d fight first
But dwellin’ on it only makes the night worse
Now I’m poppin’ Vic’s, Perc’s and Methadone pills
“Yeah, Em, tight verse
You killed it”
Fuckin’ drug dealers hang around me like yes men
And they gon’ do whatever I says when I says it
It’s in their best interest to protect their investment
And I just lost my fuckin’ best friend
So fuck it I guess then

I’m going through changes
I’m going through changes
Don’t know what I’m gonna do, but I just keep on going through changes

My friends can’t understand this new me
That’s understandable
Man, but think how bananas you’d be
You’d be an animal too
If you were trapped in this fame and caged in it like a zoo
And everybody’s lookin’ at you
What you want me to do?
I’m starting to live like a recluse
And the truth is fame’s startin’ to give me an excuse
To be at a all time low
I sit alone in my home theater
Watchin’ the same damn DVD of the first tour, the last tour
He was still alive
And it hurts so I fast forward
Sleepin’ pills will make me feel alright
And if I’m still awake in the middle of the night
I’ll just take a couple more
Yeah, you’re mother fuckin’ right
I ain’t slowin’ down for no one
I am almost homeward bound
Almost in a coma, yeah
Homie, come on dole ‘em out
“Daddy don’t you die on me
Daddy better hold your ground”
Fuck, don’t I know the sound of that voice
Yeah, baby hold me down

I’m going through changes
I’m going through changes
Don’t know what I’m gonna do, but I just keep on going through changes

Wake up in the hospital
Full of tubes
But somehow I’m pulling through
Swear when I come back I’ma be bullet proof
I’ma do it just for Proof
I think I should state a few facts
Cause I may not get a chance again to say the truth
Shit, it just hit me that what if I would not have made it through?
I think about the things I would have never got to say to you
I’d never get to make it right
So here’s what I came to do
Hailie this one is for you, Whitney and Alaina too
I still love your mother, that’ll never change
Think about her every day
We just could never get it together
Hey, wish there was a better way for me to say it
But I swear on everything, I’ll do anything for her on any day
There are just too many things to explain
When it rains, guess it pours, yes it does
Wish there wasn’t any pain
But I can’t pretend there ain’t
I ain’t placin’ any blame
I ain’t poitin’ fingers, Heavens knows I’ve never been a Saint
I know that it feels like we just pissed away our history
And just today, I looked at your picture
Almost if to say “I miss you” subconsciously
Wish it didn’t end this way
But I just had to get away
Don’t know why
I don’t know what else to say
I guess I’m

I’m going through changes
I’m going through changes
Don’t know what I’m gonna do, but I just keep on going through changes